Monday, September 11, 2006

The Cabbage Patch

The doll, not the dance. (OK, so as a child of the 80's I remember both the Cabbage Patch dolls and the Cabbage Patch "dance" which I was once forced to do on stage wearing a nun's a Baptist university, but that's a different story.)

One of the exciting attic finds at my mom's house was of my Cabbage Patch collection. Be nice. In 1983, I was 10. Cabbage Patches were necessary elements for coolness then. They showed how hard your parents would work to keep you in the "In" crowd. I had good parents. I have a boy, a girl, and a Koosa (weird pet thing with a mohawk). I also have some generics, the dolls that other people made and sold because you couldn't get your hands on a real Cabbage Patch dolls.

Currently, they are all naked. I am de-dust-ifying all their clothes and Febreeze-ing their plastic heads and yarn hair. Maybe tomorrow I can show you pictures.

P.S. For all of my loyal readers who don't know what the Cabbage Patch dance is, this definition is from the Urban dictionary. Be very specific when you say "cabbage patch" because it apparently means other, much less polite, things besides the doll and the dance. Who knew?
1. cabbage patch-Dance move that guys tried to have catch on to confuse women into thinking that guys have rhythm. Successfully performed when both your shoulders and fists (which are placed together in a manner that looks like you just connected both ends of an extension cord) move in time with each other in a fluid, circular motion. All the rage in the late 80's and early 90's.

"Jeremiah did the cabbage patch at a youth group mixer, and all the girls flocked to him because he tricked them into thinking that he had rhythm. He's really a poser."

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