Tuesday, April 14, 2009

First loser

I searched these up, but I remembered both of these chants from my long-ago softball days:

"You gotta want it, to win it, and we want it more!"

"We're number one, can't be number two, we're gonna beat the whoopsies outta you!"

I might be the only one of us with this date marked on my calendar, but today is a big day. Remember that little writing contest I entered? At lunch I'll go and hear the winning entries. And when I was talking at lunch the other day, I mentioned that this could be the end of the writing career as I know it. (Fortunately, the road hasn't been all that long anyway so getting home won't difficult.) And one of my well-adjusted friends says, "I thought you wrote because you had to, because of the satisfaction, not the money or..."

Here's something you may already know if you've spent any amount of time with me: I'm a little competitive. I like to win. And in most things I do, I need to be really good or I want to do something else, something more like watch t.v. or read a book.

I told that nice person who probably does things just because she actually enjoys them that really, all I wanted was a certificate acknowledging my outstanding-ness at something. This is why I miss school some days. There I was pretty sure I was close to the top. Not so much with the knitting or the sewing or the athletics or even the whole "being normal" thing. With grades, you always know where you stand. I'd write papers today if someone would just grade them for me. And add a smiley face now and then.

I think I might be getting a little better. I know I'm not ready for First Place. Second place (a.k.a. First Loser in some circles) or Third Place...both are perfectly acceptable for my first attempt. Right?

I'll let you know how it goes. If the blog mysteriously disappears, you'll know I've trashed it in a fit of artistic pique. I don't have any of that yet, but I could probably get some between now and lunch.

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